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Here’s one major caveat: You need to communicate exactly what the arrangement is. “For any type of ethical non-monogamy to work peacefully, and here I’ll include swinging, you really have to be on top of your communication game, and be incredibly self-aware,” says Dr. Emily Morse, host of the podcast “ Sex With Emily ”and author of Smart Sex.“Most folks think any type of non-monogamy is about more sex, but if anything, it requires more communication!” You need to take extra time to process your emotions around your sexual relationships and how its impacting your main partner, even if you develop other sexual and romantic connections, emphasizes Morse. Learn to take care of your heart and yourself. Get connected to a great therapist, counselor or coach who can help you navigate the decisions that will lead you to the great life and love you deserve. But maybe she's not attracted to her husband anymore and is wondering if that's because she's a lesbian. Through meeting and exploring sex with other couples, learning new peoples’ bodies and preferences can help you become more aware of your own and your partner’s as a result, says Morse. That self-awareness piece (and knowledge of your partner) is key here. If either of you tend to experience jealousy intensely, then swinging could potentially be a challenge for your relationship, according to Morse. Once you’ve established what jealousy looks like or doesn’t look like for you as a couple, you can move on to thinking about swinging more seriously. “From there, you and your partner may find you even strengthen your communication and trust, and build an even more solid foundation upon which to have sexy adventures,” says Morse.

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